The answer to the question of Life, the Universe, and Everything is... Four day work week, two ply toilet paper!" Anonymous

If I promise to miss you ... Will you go away? Anonymous

It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it. Henry Allen

A single Mom was asked by a friend what her son was taking in college. With a sigh she replied, "Everything I have."

Marriages are made in heaven. But, again, so are thunder, lightning, tornados and hail. Mae West

Whenever man comes up with a better mousetrap, nature immediately comes up with a better mouse. James Carswell

The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln

If a man speaks in the forest, and there's no woman around to hear him...Is he still wrong? Unknown

The shortest distance between two points is always under construction. Noelie Alite

Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them. Antoine de Saint-Exupery

When I was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father ... I'm very sorry. We did everything we could ... but he pulled through. Rodney Dangerfield

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. Mark Russell